"... Palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy." Eminem captures nerves like no one else. Who can't read that and not vividly feel their stomach turning in anticipation and fear of the unknown?
This was me three weeks ago. I had a first date, and for some reason it felt like my first first date. The night before I frantically tried on over 10 sweater-pants combinations, sending pictures to 5 different people begging for opinions. Desperately analyzing the details down to the pairings of the different boots matched with various earrings and necklaces. I hadn't agonized over details like this since I prepped for my first job interview, and this time I stayed uncertain until the last moments before the date when I made a final switch on the necklace (which I think took the look from work to evening out.)
Adding to the anticipation was the fact that it was a late starting date - 8pm on a Friday in the District - which meant that I had to not only get through the work day, but find a way not to go mad for the 2.5 hours between work and the date. Luckily, C. took mercy on me and let me hang out at his place until he had to head out on his date. Unfortunately, his date started before mine, so I still had plenty of time to wonder why I had chosen the maroon pants instead of the blue chords - what was I thinking!? No matter how many times I reminded myself that I had done this before, that I actually enjoyed dating, and that I considered myself quite the accomplished dater - I could not shake the nerves. I managed to choke down the english muffin with peanut butter that I brought - in case we didn't eat it would give me something in my stomach without giving me a food baby belly, but even that was making me a bit nauseous.
As the clock ticked down I closed up C.'s apartment and headed over. The weather must have felt my anxiety because the temperatures had dropped and the wind picked up - making a mess of my perfectly done hair. I arrived with a few minutes to spare and ran to the restroom to try and fix myself up as best I could before the zero hour arrived. As I walked across the tile, my heels were clicking - matching the tattoo of my heart, my breath backing up as my anticipation built, and all the last minute nerves skittering through my body as I approached the bar nervously looking around and wondering if we would recognize each other...
And we did.
More to come on my dating adventures.
