This week I had my third speech for Toastmasters and I thought it might make for a good third post, as it gives some more insight into me and where I am at in my life right now. As such, here it is, I hope you enjoy!
Over the last year I started noticing strange phrases coming out of my mouth - things like: "Why do you have to shorten baby to Bae?" "What is AF and why do small children keep saying it?" "Are these interns really old enough to have a job?" "On Fleek, seriously?" Which culminated in the big question - When did I get old?
Seriously, how can I be out of touch, I'm barely over 30 - this isn't supposed to happen until you hit 40, right? I mean I manage the Twitter account for my practice group and produce my firm's cybersecurity podcast. I am in touch with what is happening in the universe, and yet this weekend I said "youngins." And last month when I trained for the tutoring program I am participating in - I discovered that kids don't even learn to read in the same way that I did....when did that happen? I never thought that not having a kid would make me feel older - but missing a whole change in the teaching curriculum certainly took me by surprise.
Faced with this new insight, I turned to the internet to confirm my suspicions. It turns out that the transition from your 20s to your 30s can be summed up with stunning accuracy on the Buzzfeed (see also, parties, drinking, life). According to the multiple lists I found on the subject - I was acing being 30 by discovering rather suddenly that I am old. Apparently after college, the years sort of blend together and you don't realize how old you are - and this is how it all begins. I won't go into all of the items on these lists, but there were a few overarching themes that really hit home on the subject.
First up, Facebook. I won't claim that the change in my facebook feed occurred overnight, but it did seem to happen a bit like a tidal wave. All of the sudden the concert pics and status updates about that amazing new club opening were replaced with engagements, weddings, trips to Costco, and babies...so many babies. How do I know this many people who have multiple children - it is like they hit up a BOGO sale on babies - why get just one, when you can an extra for half price?!
Next up, getting carded. I remember those first few heady months of being 21 and excitedly handing over my ID every time the bouncer held out his hand. I also remember those few years of being annoyed about the hassle of it. And then it happened. I showed up at the bar and was waived in, while some nubile young thing behind me was asked to hand over proof of age. And suddenly getting carded became awesome again. Every time I get asked now - it is like the ultimate compliment. I don't care that it is the law in DC to card everyone - I am choosing to believe that they think I don't look a day over 20 and forking it over with a stupid, smug smile on my face.
On the upside of actually not being 21 - and sub-point on this list - at least I have learned that red wine beats shots. Not only is it heart healthy (among other benefits), but also hangovers suck. I mean back in my 20s it could be rectified with a breakfast sandwich and Gatorade, but now after a few shots to commiserate Nirvana being played on the classic rock station (really?!) and I am punished with a 2 day hangover.
Back to the list, FOMO, or more exactly, the dissipation of FOMO. Somewhere in my late 20s, the fear of missing out started to disappear and by the time I hit 30, FOMO was a thing of the past. It was like I had earned an adult scouting badge the first time I turned down plans that weren't 100% appealing and instead stayed in on a Friday night to eat pizza, watch some Netflix, and go to bed early. I didn't care if my friends were having fun at some amazing concert - I was happy to be binge watching My Name is Earl and scarffing down Dominos. It was a magical night and I'm pretty sure that my FB status message about it was more exciting than the 95th baby picture that popped up in my feed that night.
As a seemingly conflicting item, "Being Busy." Now, this one falls into both the 20s vs. 30s list and the "You might live in DC if" lists, because if you live in this city your calendar is required to be full. But either way - suddenly my datebook is jam-packed with wedding showers, birthday parties, book clubs, alumni events, networking cocktail hours, dates, travel, toastmasters, out of town visitors, and get-togethers with other overbooked friends. I think this is part of the reason that FOMO disappears, when I have this many obligatory appointments, I really cherish those nights off and try to limit what bookings I can. I really relish those instances when I can say no to something and clear a night off.
Finally, people assume you have your shit together. I saved this one for last because it totally sneaked up on me and until I read the Buzzfeed list I didn't even realize it had happened. However it had. This summer when those babies they called interns came into the office they looked at me expectantly while I gave them their assignments and made appointments with me to discuss the details. Our 23 year old assistants call me to ask how I would handle projects, and the new guy wants to get coffee to "pick my brain." The initial reaction of "Oh crap, they think I know what I am doing," was eventually followed with, "well I do." Because I have been doing this for almost 10 years now and I really do have the answers to the questions they ask, and if I don't know, I can usually figure it out. It was shocking to realize that I was at the tail end of that whole, fake it until you make it thing.
So as I finished reading though all these lists explaining to me all the ways that I am indeed old. I realized that it wasn't all bad, sure I don't know the names of all the guys in One Direction, or the latest terminology - but if I really need to find out - there is always Google (or a new crop of interns to ask). And ultimately, even if I could, I wouldn't go back to my 20s, unless it was to invest more in my 401(k).
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